* * *

we lost a friend this week. it was unexpected and sad, and so very heartbreaking. he leaves behind a little girl not much older than my emma. he leaves behind a strong, beautiful wife; my friend who makes me laugh week after week. he leaves behind so many wonderful memories of a kind, loyal, gentle man who always led with a smile, and never had a harsh word to say. he leaves behind a community that will truly miss him.

there is something so profound about being part of a community. being part of a group of people that so truly care about each other, and worry about each other, and accept each other. i never would have imagined finding it here, in this big city so far from “home” and so much of my family, but here it is – a strong family that celebrates together and works together and grieves together with equal intensity.

i am grateful for them; all of them. and i’m grateful for the lifetime so far with my children and my husband; i know time is fleeting, and we’ve no guarantees. i’m grateful to wear my love and affection on my sleeve; i may be a little too heavy on the hearts-and-rainbows for some, but i’ll never regret living out loud. i’m grateful that, in the absence of answers or anything concrete “to do”/to help, i can put those warm thoughts and those tears together and pray; call it prayer, call it a big pink cloud-bubble of love, call it well-intentioned thought…it’s so personal, but sometimes it’s all i’ve got.

rest in peace, dear friend.
xoxo