. . . . . . . . .

and just like that… POOF! i’m much busier than i realized. totally in the weeds as we used to say in my days as a waitress. i love my jobs, love the things i do, love not having to go to an office every day, love being an artist, love staying home with emma, love cuddling up in the evenings with bear and love the direction my dreams have taken me. but sometimes i worry that it’s not sustainable. i’m running too fast, trying to do it all, sacrificing my ideals and failing to come through for people. if i get off schedule – off list – at all, i flounder and get frustrated with myself. i want to do, to BE, successful at so many things i’m just touching the surface of, but i also really really long for a life where we don’t have to hustle so hard.

alas, that paragraph is all the time/space i can even devote to the life-contemplation right now….that’s not such a bad thing. things are good, REALLY good. they’re just not always easy.

hopefully tomorrow i’ll have time to get back to my happy beach-zen-cape-cod place. much like vienna, i know it’s waiting for me.